Note 14: The Dewey Mountains

The Noodle Files:

Noodle showed up at the café early the next morning because he knew the sight he would see. As expected Dab’s, the new Edna, clutched his knees on the floor, suckling his thumb. Watching the grown man sleep, Noodle marveled at how even this fruit-cake could be cute . Dabs twitched as he chased the rabbit in his dreams. Noodle’s thoughts almost bent towards kindness, when the toilet flushed, carrying nuggets of unwanted human waste to an unknown place.

Little Brother strutted out of the bathroom, neglecting the fan “Hey Cuz !”Little Brother said slapping Noodle on the shoulder. “If I’d known you were here, I would have left you a gift.”

Noodle knew this was one of the few truths out of his cousins mouth because every day was a potential Christmas when Little Brother played Santa with poo. Noodle’s hand dove deep within his own pocket, fingers grappling for his digital security blanket, even though it had died a week ago (if one does not pay one’s plan, one gets unplugged). Naked he faced his cousin’s brilliance with a silent whimper. Little Brother’s high-tops squeaked on the hard wood floor, announcing every one of Little Brother’s steps. A trail of puddles marked the history of Little Brother’s invasion. Noodle went for the mop (it wasn’t his cellular but it was better than nothing) Little Brother grabbed a Mountain Dew from the back of cans in the refreshment case. Wiping the finger smudges off the glass, Noodle pursed his lips together to let his steam out without an explosion.

Little Brother hiked the soft seat of his pants higher over his hinie and slapped a dollar on the counter.

“Those are a dollar-fifty, you Dill-dower.” Noodle said standing at ease with his mop cocked and loaded. “Fifty cents! you’re going to argue over fifty cents?” Little Brother cracked the lid open and slurped the neon liquid in big gulps.

Noodle blocked the can with his mop handle. “Unless you want to mop, Douche-zella.”

Little Brother lifted the can to his fat lips.

Don’t be such a grandma.”

Dabs rolled over and recoiled with a groan. The cousins paused to watch him. Then Noddle walked over to the register, adding fifty cents from his pocket and put it in the till for Little Brother’s morning Dew.

Little Brother watched Noodle “So, who was that girl you were with last night?”

Noodle froze in the predator’s radar.


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